Tooth Fairies and Puke Pots

The last two weeks have been…..well, just not much fun. Sick kids tend to make life a little more trying. And there’s that funny thing about having more than one child. Sickness never, NO, not ever stays self-contained. No matter how many times you Clorox-clean the door handles, wash the linens or Lysol every square inch of the house, it always spreads to the others. Two weeks ago, d1 had strep. No big deal. After one round of meds, he was good as new.

Then last week d2 had strep but with the added fun of vomiting and, specifically, when I’m driving. First day started on I-85. He said he thought he might throw up. All I could find in my immediate reach was a cardboard tissue box. I mean, I was driving 70mph – my options were limited. I handed it to him and, as he waited for that first surge to hit him, he got bored, I guess, because he started disassembling the box. I told him to stop in case he did throw up and before I even finished the sentence, he was filling the container with his breakfast. I quickly cut off handfuls of cars in my attempt to cross three lanes of traffic to get to the nearest exit. I warned him to hold the box very still while I pull off at Burger King to get rid of the box and get him a Sprite and a new ‘puke pot’ until we got back home. As I pulled in the drive thru, he was handing me the box and, just as the lady said, ‘Welcome to Burger King, can I take your order?,’ the flood gates opened, so to speak. Remember the side he dismantled moments before? Oh yes and right in my lap. I’m sure the lady on the other side of the speaker was probably a little grossed out by my dry heaving noises. I really can deal with most anything – poop, boogers, bleeding, severed worms. I don’t really freak too much over such things. But vomit? Oh, the sounds and the smells I just cannot do.

The second time in the car wasn’t nearly as traumatic to me personally, more so to the floorboard so I won’t go into details. I think the last one was enough, don’t you? Good.Times.For.Sure.

Thankfully, this is really the first bout of funk we have had to fight in several months. We were fortunate to make it through the true cough, cold and flu season rather unscathed so I guess we had ours coming but no one likes their baby to be sick. OK, maybe that’s not entirely true. I would be lying if I said I didn’t enjoy the lethargic yet cuddly behavior when their fevers are rising. It was a refreshing break to have them laying on the couch, asking me to hold them rather than comparing Best Somersault off the side of the same couch. So….there it is. Infection, stay away! You are NOT welcome in this household….EVER.

Oh and let’s not forget that d2 also lost his first tooth last week. He lost his a good year before d1 lost his first one so we were a little surprised. Of course, we shouldn’t have been. I’m not sure this little toofer was really ready to pop out but after attending a birthday party at Monkey Joe’s with Daddy, d2 came home with it hanging by a thread. Now, the story that I got was that d2 was in a bounce house with a friend and when D1 peeked in on him and did a little wrestling, his mouth somehow ‘bumped’ D1’s hand. However, since I know just how much D1 enjoys {fake} boxing with the boys {he’s even taught them to make the punching noise and to fall down very dramatically}, I would guess that is how the fist met the face.

And to finish the bizarre story of Father Knocking Child’s First Tooth Loose, d2 went to school a couple of days later {with tooth still in place, albeit barely hanging on} and when I picked him up, I noticed his tooth was gone. When I asked him where it was, he just shook his head. He didn’t know when it fell out or where it was. Our best guess is that it was washed down with that day’s meatloaf. When he started to realize that no tooth may mean no tooth fairy which may mean no loot, he started to get upset. First we told him that we would make a fake tooth. Then we thought a letter might be better, explaining what happened. Of course, it didn’t help that d1 was standing there, whispering in his ear, ‘The tooth fairy won’t leave you any dollars if you don’t have your tooth. She’ll just fly right over. She only wants real teeth, not notes. I’m about to lose a tooth soon and I won’t lose it. I bet I'll get a lot of dollars.’ {Don’t you love the older brother commentary?}

So, the quick-on-his-feet thinker that he is, D1 ran upstairs, came back down and told d2 to check his pockets again, that maybe the tooth had fallen in while he was eating. He helped him look and, all of a sudden, a small, white tooth magically appeared. He was SO excited and I was quite impressed with D1’s sharp skills. Almost makes up for him knocking the tooth loose in the first place.

No, we don’t just keep random baby teeth in our sock drawer – it was d1’s first tooth…..and he’ll never know…..that is, until he reads this one day…..

Disney Or Bust

Maybe I was feeling brave when he called. Or maybe I was overdosed with cough and cold medicine and somewhat delirious. I can’t really remember. Either way, when my Uncle J called a couple of months ago and invited us to spend a week at Disney World with his family, I said yes. Of course I waited to give a final answer until I talked it over with D1 but who are we kidding? I knew he would jump on it. What kid doesn’t want to go play at WDW? I’m pretty sure he’s more excited about it than d1 or d2 but that shouldn’t surprise anyone…..

Whether or not I’m second guessing that decision is irrelevant. We are going. In July. Yes, I know. Insane. But if I’m going to look at the bright side of that brilliant idea, I anticipate dropping at least two pounds of day from the amount of sweat I will undoubtedly expel. Anyway, Uncle J has a vacation home in Orlando that is large enough to accommodate us and his family and will save us a huge chunk of cash. Hip hip hooray for the free stay! Not to mention the fact that we don’t have to pay for airfare because we are just a short five hour drive from the Happiest Place on Earth, which is nothing for this nomadic clan. It’s a pretty sweet deal all around, although pricing these park tickets does tend to make me a little nauseous. After paying for four tickets x four days, we may have nothing left for food. We may be eating Chicken Helper and Spam sandwiches but, by golly, we WILL have Mickey’s autograph and we WILL ride Space Mountain, not to mention the enormous amount of memories we will create while there.

So, my fellow bloggers and readers, I’m looking for tips. It can be from your own personal experience or something you heard while standing in line at the post office. I don’t care. I am just looking for ways to make this vacation great, despite the fact that I have two chronic complainers and one short stack that insists on showing me his disappearing act. I’ve been making a list as I hear them. I think I even came across a blog devoted to surviving Disney trips with small children, which that in itself tells me we’re in for a real treat. I’ve heard it wise to spend the money for the double strollers and to dress your kids in bright clothing so they are easy to spot if when they get separated. What else ya got? And preferably not, 'DON'T DO IT!'

A Habit and A Hobby

When I was pregnant with d1, I read a lot of books, magazines and articles on parenting. No, a lot. Some were very helpful and some were just plain evil and only escalated my new mother anxiety. I really thought I had read everything and would know what to do in every situation until the day the children went away to college. Funny, I know. The very definition of naïve.

Though I have learned a bazillion new things in the almost-seven years that I’ve been a mother, I never really thought I’d have to house break my child. Oh, not where the potty is concerned. We've managed to really succeed in that area {but I have a feeling d3 will want to be 'unique' when it comes time}. I'm talking about chewing. As ridiculous as that may sound, we have recently had to remove Woody from d2’s room because he has munched away the rim of his cowboy hat AND his nose. It was rather puzzling altogether but even more so that he chose his nose. I mean, why not the boots? They are long and pointy. You would think the nose was a little more work to gnaw on, given the fact that Woody doesn’t have a Pinocchio honker. And d2 is not really a nervous little feller. He has the carefree personality of the bunch but, for whatever reason, he’s taken up this new hobby. I don’t know. Maybe I should review his diet. Clearly there is something missing, though last time I checked, plastic was NOT added to a major food group.

Actually, as I think about this, I think he has too much time on his hands at night so he must be doing this out of boredom. Since he naps in K-4, he isn’t tired at bedtime and, though we could push his bedtime back a bit, the other two require a little more sleep so we put them all down at the same time. While d1 is out in minutes, d2 will lay in his bed for a while, sometimes up to two hours after we put him down, until he finally drifts off to sleep. I expect this will end next year when he starts Kindergarten and no longer has his little siesta. Lawd, I hope so. Maybe then he’ll cut down on his new habit…..

…..and his new hobby of spitting. I’m not talking about the normal, male-rite-of-passage spitting where it begins and ends in three seconds. Oh no, my son is an overachiever. Have you seen the movie, ‘Big Daddy’ where Adam Sandler ‘adopts’ a little boy and teaches him how to do ‘the thing?’ Here’s a recap for those having trouble recalling it up in your memory bank..



Good news, friends. The 'Big Daddy' in our house has passed on the same tips to d2. Oh and he's pretty good at it. I imagine he perfects his skills late at night after he's all gnawed out. I noticed it last week when we were at an 80th birthday party for D1’s uncle. Great place to find out that your son has that sort of gift. I’m sure I was just beaming with pride.

Happy Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day to all! This year was probably the best one yet with my guys. I woke up to a text alert of below video. Is d3 a kook or what?




So I followed their instructions and went into each room to find these.....



Each hand made card held a GC to my favorite places - Starbucks and Panera.

I did want to zero in on one of the cards in particular. d2 has a history of inappropriate descriptive drawings and this one is no different.



Though he drew in some additional 'parts' for me, he was advised to color over said area. He was sweet enough, though, to put me in high heels but I'm a little curious as to my new figure. I mean, I'm no Olive Oyl but really?

Then I came downstairs to a bouquet of flowers....



Gifts....



They know me so well, they even made me Mommy Coupons....



My boys really are THE best!

The Beauty of Beads

Last Friday night, I attended a 'Royal' themed jewelry party. We played dress up*, ate yummy fondue and watched recaps of Prince Wills and Kate wed in royal fashion. And then we shopped....a lot! I got myself a few things but also knocked out some Mother's Day gifts as well.

My friend Kendra has all the pics and specifics so go here to read all about it. It's really an awesome story, the goods are NOT expensive {at or even below local sales prices on comparable products} and I cannot think of a better way to spend my money than by supporting a Jesus-loving momma who just wants the best for her little boy......

If you are interested in having a party, hit me up and I'll get you in touch with Alissa.

*Girls, can we have one of these every Friday night? I loved playing dress up and I enjoy a little make-believe but the only pretending my little d's are interested in involves ninjas and nunchucks.....and I'm just not a big fan of either.

Car Line Convos

Today's version of 'Darnell's Say the Darndest', brought to you by your local sponsor.....


d1 – When did you graduate?
Me – Thirteen years ago {gasp!}
d1 – When did you get married?
Me – In 2003.
d1 – Why did you marry Daddy?
Me – I married Daddy because I love him. He is an amazing man.
d1 – Amazing? Really? Even when he farts? Because he does it all the time.
Me – Well……you do have a point. How about we keep that to ourselves and not share with the class this morning…..


As far as I know, d1 didn't go and share the specifics on his father's flatulence. Seriously, though. What is it about the car that sparks conversations like these? It wasn’t that long ago that I was subjected to pre-pubescent interrogation.....




This man I call my spouse is something else. It’s hard to describe him. Take the above picture, for example. The little boys didn’t suggest the goofy face – he did. Who else thinks he looks a little too much like Gilligan? {good call, Angie!} He is absolutely the ringleader in this little circus of ours. Sometimes it makes me insane. He does still find 'tooting' as funny as the 4-year-old but my research tells me that is the consensus with ALL males, young and old. Sure, finding his underwear on the kitchen counter makes me see red. Watching him ‘slice’ d2’s neck with the NerfAxe while wearing the Storm Trooper helmet and SuperMan cape has me wondering if he licked a can of lead paint as a child. Sometimes I want to strangle him for his childish behavior. I mean, is it any wonder why the children {not just ours} flock to him? HE'S STILL A KID. And yes, far too often I find myself screaming ‘GROW UP!’ but the truth is I love his sense of humor. I love watching him run like Forrest Gump. I love when he makes up dances from out of the blue. I absolutely love everything about him.

Note to self: tell him a little more often.

Love you, Big D.