Who Am I?

Heal my heart and make it clean
Open up my eyes to the things unseen
Show me how to love like you have loved me

Break my heart from what breaks yours
Everything I am for your kingdoms cause

I am brought to tears every time I hear these words. I mean, dang! I know it’s just a song and I know I can be a an emotional mess little sappy at times but that’s some powerful stuff if you are truly ‘hearing’ it.

This is not a sad post. In fact, it’s a very happy post. Joyful, even. I like that adjective better because I truly have joy in my life that I’ve never, ever experienced before and really struggle to find the words to describe. What’s even better is that D1 is filled with this same overwhelming joy. Coincidence? No way. It is, however, further proof that we are equally yoked and that is a great feeling in and of itself.

So back to this joy thing. Although I became a Christian seven years ago, it’s not until recently that I realized I wasn’t truly seeking Him with all my heart. I wasn’t asking for opportunities to share the Gospel with others. I wasn’t desperately searching for ways to meet the needs of others on His behalf. In this last year {and more so these last few months}, I’ve done just that. I’ve asked God to use my talents, lead my paths, break my heart, whatever it takes. In fact, D1 and I both have and, no surprise, He has been faithful and answered each and every one of those prayers.

Oh, and the conviction that has been placed on us? Indescribable and can only be attributed to the Spirit. Where we once were timid, we are now both so bold. {P.S. -that doesn’t just happen.} but it's just further proof of the work He's doing in our lives. As one person put it, we are 'on fire for Jesus.' I'm good with that. I would say that someone on fire has some urgency in their lives and, these days, we can identify with that, just slightly different.

The Lord created us and knows us better than we know ourselves. Ask Him to use you in only a way that He can but GET READY because if you truly mean it, He’ll show up big time. And let me tell you from experience that there is no greater joy than being in the will of God. I never understood how that was possible but I can tell you that it's not malarky. It's the real deal. And it's amazing. I'm changing my, 'Who am I' question to a 'Here I am' submission.

Big things continue to unfold in our lives. We don't know what else is ahead but we trust that wherever He guides, He provides. Now, I don’t really see us leaving for Uganda as international missionaries any time soon {I’ll leave that to you, Kelley C} but who really knows....

Stay tuned.


ETA: Yes, I like Casting Crowns but I didn't realize that I have now named four of my posts after their songs. A little bizarre, yes. It's really just my lack of creativity and/or laziness for titles.