Do Unto Others

Earlier this month when I attended Catalyst, I heard a message from Judah Smith. If you haven’t heard any of his preaching, you’re doing a disservice to yourself. This dude is charismatic and captivating. He leads The City Church in Seattle and his messages are unique but very clear-cut and oh-so-compelling. And he’s probably the only other guy besides Steven Furtick that can pull off skinny jeans. That doesn’t mean I don’t still think they look funny but I don’t cringe as much….

Anyway, when I came back and shared with Dallas, he started listening to Judah’s podcasts and can’t get enough of them. You should check them out sometime. BEWARE –you will quickly become an addict. There are worse things than being addicted to sermons, right? Nod your head, the answer is yes.

I’m not just rambling on and on about Judah – I do have a point to this story. A couple of days ago, Dallas came home and was telling me about the message he listened to earlier that day. Judah does something with his children that we’re starting with ours. When Dallas drops Dagen and Davis off at school {which very soon might be ME doing – WOOP – and picking up – double WOOP}, he reminds them of three things, a pact of sorts – ‘Because we are Darnell’s and we love the Lord, we are going to:

1) Be kind
2) Be encouraging
3) Look for lonely people

Simple yet pretty profound, right? We know it might take a while for some of it to really ‘click’ but I think it’s a great reminder each morning for how they can be more like Jesus with those three easy actions.

It’s weird that this happened – Dallas hearing that sermon and having that lay on his heart – because it triggered some memories from my past that I guess I’ve tried really hard to repress. It just so happens that these memories cover all three of the above actions - or, rather, the lack thereof.

When I was in the 4th grade, we lived in Massachusetts. There was a classmate of mine - we’ll call her ‘Callie’ - who I assume had some developmental delays and it was pretty obvious that she was from a very poor home. She talked funny, her hair was always a hot mess and her clothes were usually the same three sweat-suits rotated out. But what I do remember is her trying so hard to ‘fit in’ with the other girls, particularly me. She wanted to and tried so hard to be my friend yet all I wanted to do was make fun of her. While I made my friends laugh, I made ‘Callie’ cry - daily. I was a ruthless, wretched bully.

Here I am, two decades later, and I am just sickened by my behavior. That was someone’s child! That was somebody’s baby girl that I treated like garbage! Who on earth did I think I was to act like I was any better than her? I wasn’t wearing Z Cavaricci jeans and K-Swiss, either. I was poor, too, but apparently I figured that if I kept the attention on ‘Callie’ being underprivileged, no one would notice I had the same pair of pants on every day.

I’m not really sure what I can do now. We moved after that year and I never saw her again. Even if I ever find ‘Callie’ now, on Facebook or by some other means of communication, it will never make amends for the person I was or the things that I did to her but that doesn’t mean I’m not going to try.

You know what’s crazy? I can remember all of these details about ‘Callie’ yet I can’t even remember what we ate for dinner last week. As much as I’d like to forget, I think I was supposed to remember so that someday I would feel the burning conviction in my soul and turn it into something good. Maybe it has something to do with my burden now for the homeless, the impoverished, the hopeless. Maybe it’s just another way God is going to use something I did that was so awful to bring Him glory. Just maybe.

I know you hear that ‘kids are just mean these days,’ that it’s ‘normal’ and all a part of growing up but it’s not. It’s never normal and it’s never okay. Just because that’s how it’s always been doesn’t mean that’s how it always needs to be. Teach your children to love themselves and love others like Jesus loves them. Imagine a world where we all applied the Golden Rule. It is not impossible – nothing is. {Luke 1:37}